Right from the first page, you know that author Jennifer M. Banks, a registered psychotherapist, is not the “sage on the stage” kind of teacher. The prologue opens with her husband shooting himself with a nail gun, fainting in a surge of anger, and knocking out his teeth.
Shocking, yes. But, with Banks’ lively writing style, there’s also—I hesitate to admit this—humour.
She uses that moment to invite the reader into her own marriage, sharing their therapy journey (he was prone to anger and she was needy), what she learned about how to negotiate being part of a couple, resolve differences, support each other, and survive one of you knocking out his teeth at a low point.
In addition to humour and honesty, Banks illustrates her practical and actionable advice with small stories, appropriately anonymized, about couples she has worked with in therapy, adding key takeaways.
This book, the “Couples Edition,” could be used by both parties to help resolve issues in a relationship or prevent them. It’s also good for someone to read and learn from on their own.
Things Your Therapist Can’t Say is fun to read and full of sensible, insightful, and actionable advice.
And spoiler alert: Banks and her husband are still together and very happy.